non-monogamy and d/s: the warm and fuzzy and the cold and clammy

I’ve noticed that a lot of what draws me to power relationships is the same stuff that draws me to non-monogamy and vice versa. Let me lay out a few common points. Interestingly, all these points can be experienced as warm and fuzzy, but they can also be pretty darn hard. If you’ve experienced the … More non-monogamy and d/s: the warm and fuzzy and the cold and clammy


Warning! Erotic content on the way. I know, I almost never do this, but much like that time last October, I’ve once again experienced the joy of a surprise short-duration writing exercise which produced some creative juice. And so once again I figured I’d post the results here for your entertainment. This time, the impetus … More resistance

shame and shameless

Two little items for you tonight… First, Capital Xtra just published a feature I wrote about queer shame – specifically, about the social mechanism of shame and how it plays out in queer lives. In addition to my own pontifications on the topic, I talked to San Francisco-based sex educator Charlie Glickman, who works as … More shame and shameless

queer and the family

Sometime last year, I came across this little gem of a paragraph on the blog “Adventures in Deconstruction” by Mary Bryson, a queer theory professor at UBC. She’s referring here to a gathering of people at her home for Christmas: […] [P]lease don’t think ‘queer’ is about the sex/gender of who folks cozy up to. … More queer and the family