In response to this Twitter thread from Melissa A. Fabello, I have some thoughts on jealousy vs possessiveness to share. Attache ta tuque, as they say! I appreciate how the writer normalizes jealousy. I agree that jealousy truly is not a polyamory thing, it’s a human thing, and it’s at least as common, if not … More jealousy is to possessiveness as erotica is to porn?
Today I want to tackle (read: tear apart) a common kink misconception I’ve been hearing off and on for the better part of twenty years. That is: in BDSM, the power is actually in the hands of the bottom or submissive. This statement is profoundly weird. I think people started saying it in order to … More against the false flip: on mutuality in kink
Today I am spurred to rant about the social model of disability and why it’s inadequate. The social model says, essentially, that disability, rather than being a characteristic of an individual, is created by society. On its surface, this is super useful. For instance: if a building has stairs, and a person cannot go up … More consider pain: why the social model of disability fails
“In a nutshell, the traditional Relationship Escalator looks like this: two (and only two) people progress from initial attraction and dating, to becoming sexually and romantically involved and exclusive, to adopting a shared identity as a couple, to moving in together and otherwise merging their lives—all the way up to marriage and kids, ‘til death … More off the escalator, into the library
Written Tuesday, April 17 in situ (CN: murder, police) *** I decided, on a whim, to come and write at Glad Day Bookshop. It’s smoky in here, like they burned a grilled cheese sandwich or something moments before I arrived. The gaymers are here, as usual for a Tuesday evening. The whole back section is … More on queer resilience (and rage)
Ten years ago, I wrote about the concept of earned leather. I just re-read my post and felt a wave of… nostalgia? A lot has happened in that decade, and to revisit my perspectives from 2007 feels a bit like having tea with an old friend I haven’t seen in a long time. My thoughts … More earning my leathers, ten years later
Truth: I’m only talking about one bible. Specifically, Lesbian Sex Bible: The New Guide to Sexual Love for Same-Sex Couples by Diana Cage. The buttsex part is more literal though. (Stay tuned for more, too, as my next review will be of Carlyle Jansen’s Anal Sex Basics: The Beginner’s Guide to Maximizing Anal Pleasure for … More on bibles and buttsex